Crispy leaves are falling, Target finally has its Halloween section out, and—in Florida—fog is filling the air. That means it’s spooky season!
I had the chance to visit Halloween Horror Nights 33 in Orlando this past week, doing all the haunted house about six times each. My legs and wallet are spent, but I still have some energy to share my thoughts on the event and its 10 haunted houses.
Overall, I thought HHN 33 was a solid event. To me, it was not as strong as previous years. Don’t get me wrong—Universal put together some incredible houses as always. I still had the time of my life and screamed louder than I care to admit; HHN is always the cream of the crop.
Now that my time at HHN 33 is sadly over, I wanted to take a moment to review all the houses—ranked from my least favorite to my favorite.
I use the word “rank” loosely because I enjoyed all the houses and will probably change my mind about the order tomorrow; I think every HHN fan knows the feeling. Keep in mind, this is a ranking of my favorite HHN 33 houses; they are not ranked in order of which house is technically the best. I guarantee you’ll disagree with parts of my list, and that’s okay! Art is subjective. We all like different things, and that’s why we get so many wonderfully frightening options!
Up front, I have to give a huge thank you to the amazing people who made the event possible. Whether you were a part of the planning, creating, or the boots on the ground every night—and everything in between—thank you!
Oh, and beware of spoilers ahead. Anyway, onto the list of my favorite HHN 33 houses!
My Favorite Haunted Houses from HHN 33
10. Ghostbusters Frozen Empire
Like I said, this is a list of my personal favorites. I’m genuinely sorry to all Ghostbusters fans. Ghostbusters Frozen Empire was a fantastic house, so I didn’t place it at No. 10 as an insult; something had to take the bottommost spot. Even though Ghostbusters Frozen Empire was my least favorite, it was still one of my favorites! I had 10 favorites.
Frozen Empire was one of the highest-quality houses at this year’s event. It had an impressive mix of stiltwalker scareactors, puppetry, an unhinged garbage-eating Slimer (before he was turned into a puppet), and the most detailed sets you’ll ever see in an HHN house. It had a few stunning moments, including the frostily gorgeous exterior of the Ghostbusters’ headquarters. I couldn’t help but smile at all the Mini-Puft Marshmallow Men, and every Garraka scare was downright chilling.
The only reason why I placed this house this low was because I’ve never personally connected with the Ghostbusters franchise. I know it’s an iconic series, but I didn’t see the movies as a kid. I still had a great time in this house. I’ll leave it at that before I dig any more holes for myself.
9. Major Sweets Candy Factory
As the latest scarezone-turned-haunted-house, Major Sweets Candy Factory was absolutely sweet. The Discover Universal Podcast episode was incredibly entertaining, and the house was just as fun! Once I saw a rat by my feet at the beginning of the house, I knew it was going to be a treat the whole way through.
The finger-snapping doo-wop, the silly one-liners, the guest-activated triggers, and the maze of delicious sweets made Major Sweets Candy Factory a disturbingly whimsical time. Little touches like taffy-pulling machines and packaging conveyor belts above you were the cherry on top.
In my opinion, the only thing holding this house back was its venue. The Fast & Furious: Supercharged location clearly has its limitations with narrow hallways and awkward areas in the layout. Universal improved the venue for this year, but to me, it doesn't seem ideal for the elevated and effective haunted houses HHN is known for.
Still, Major Sweets Candy Factory was definitely a sugar rush.
8. Triplets of Terror
Triplets of Terror had one of the most creative original storylines at this year’s event: A set of triplets massacred their family during their 9th birthday party and recreated the morbid event every 10 years after. We as guests followed the Barmy triplets each decade on the anniversary of the massacre, witnessing their coldblooded acts as they grew older.
The Barmy triplets were grimy, horrifying characters you wouldn’t want anywhere near you—but in this house, you had no choice. It was a disgustingly eerie idea that would make an amazing movie, or a podcast at the very least (c’mon, Universal)! But, I can say for sure the concept made for a brutally fantastic house.
I had the weird pleasure of walking through this house with no group behind me. If that feeling alone didn’t give me goosebumps, one of the triplets made sure I was properly creeped out; she followed me for a few steps, and I feel like she’s still looming behind me with her unwavering stare and baseball bat in hand.
Triplets of Terror had a nice open-ended finale as if the triplets are on the verge of being caught with the sound of a helicopter above, wind effects, and a spotlight shining down. Those type of details make you feel like you’re actually there, and HHN are masters at that.
7. Monstruos: The Monsters of Latin America
This house’s overly foggy atmosphere, gruesome visuals, unnerving sound design, upsetting smells, and unexpected jumpscares got under my skin in all the best ways. Monstruos: The Monsters of Latin America did its job as a haunted house, and that’s the best compliment I could give it.
In Monstruos, guests saw the horrors of three legends: Tlahuelpuchi, La Lechuza, and El Silbón. The massive La Lechuza puppet and the scent to go along with it were probably one of the more off-putting moments in any house this year. Not to mention, the oversized, charging, chomping El Silbón head made me jump back multiple times. And just when I thought the terror was over, a stiltwalker at the end popped out from nowhere, crouching in my face—I’m sure my scream could be heard all the way in Magic Kingdom. Well done.
6. A Quiet Place
If you’ve watched A Quiet Place, you’ll know how tense this franchise is. The house delivered that tension in every way possible. A Quiet Place felt exactly like being in a blockbuster thriller.
The Death Angel puppets were realistically articulate, showing off every detail of those large, terrorizing creatures. The ominous sound design with ear-piercing sound effects and overbearing strobe lights definitely made the environment realistically dreadful. I was uneasy walking through the flooded basement, watching a Death Angel emerge from the water, and equally impressed with one perfectly synchronized moment with a scareactor and a screen. And let’s not forget the unnerving sensory deprivation hallway to start things off!
The house’s dual ending was cinematic and probably the grandest scene in any of the houses. If I had to nitpick, I’d say this scene took too long to reset; I saw it in its full glory only a few times and unfortunately missed the action more often than not.
A Quiet Place was different than the typical HHN house, and I personally welcome that change of pace and the effort to make it as startling as possible.
5. Goblin’s Feast
Goblin’s Feast felt like the perfect pairing between Dueling Dragons: Choose Thy Fate and Blood Moon: Dark Offerings from HHN 32 (2023). The welcoming jaunt quickly turned into a gruesome journey with large sets—from the forest, to a scenic mill, to inside the castle walls.
Goblin’s Feast had an overly entertaining backstory of a twisted goblin tradition. Basically, we were the turkey in their Thanksgiving-like feast. It was perfectly silly with goblins, hobgoblins, orcs, and all sorts of scruffy scares. The giant hand reaching out for you and yet another puppet at the end were memorable moments from Goblin’s Feast.
While Goblin’s Feast had all the makings of a great haunted house, it had one major flaw to me: The conga line moved too fast. I went through this house seven times, and all seven run-throughs were very rushed. It’s hard to full enjoy a house when you’re walking like an Olympic gold medal is at stake. The house was in a brand-new venue; perhaps the walkway was too wide, allowing the conga line to flow faster than VelociCoaster. I’m exaggerating a bit, but I wanted to absorb every detail in this house!
4. Universal Monsters: Eternal Bloodlines
HHN has been on a roll with its Universal Classic Monsters houses the past few years. Eternal Bloodlines took the series in a new direction with an all-female cast, including The Bride of Frankenstein, Dracula’s Daughter, She-Wolf of London, Anck-Su-Namun, and Saskia Van Helsing—an original character for this house. Eternal Bloodlines deserves its flowers.
This house was moody in that Classic Monsters type of way. Eternal Bloodlines was a very long house with atmospheric scenes and beautiful sound design. It was well worth that brutal walk behind Men in Black: Alien Attack.
It also had the best scare at HHN 33, hands-down. An opening at the end of the woods filled with fog, and She-Wolf fiercely lunged right at you by way of a bungee. The fog was so thick that I couldn’t see the scareactor until she was right in front of me; it took me completely by surprise. This scare was immediately followed by a Saskia Van Helsing jumpscare right around the corner. That pairing was an incredible one-two punch, creating one of my favorite memories I’ve ever had at HHN.
3. Slaughter Sinema 2
The first Slaughter Sinema was one of my favorite houses of all time—it’s in my top five. So, the sequel had some yeti-sized shoes to fill. Spoiler alert: Slaughter Sinema 2 was a great house.
Was the sequel as good as the first? No, not to me at least, but it was very close. The sequel was just as fun as the first, and that’s all I wanted!
From that catchy tune inside the lobby to the final Zyborg scare, I had a smile on my face throughout this house. As ridiculous as this house was, the scareactors were having a blast; they brought the energy and made Slaughter Sinema 2 one of my favorites this year.
The jesters from Mardi Gras Murders were amazing, with their savage scare and a self-aware can-can dance right after. The Heavy Metal Hell in 3-D rockers absolutely rocked. Walking into Mummy's Toomb Adult Lounge had me in stitches every time. And I cannot forget my favorite bit: The bloodthirsty shark from Blood & Chum brought it every single night, and I can’t even describe how happy that scene made me.
I wish I could give this house five stars on Letterboxd. Bring on Slaughter Sinema 3.
2. Insidious: The Further
We might not all agree on rankings, but I think everyone can agree this house gave us all the heebie-jeebies. Insidious: The Further was one of the more startling houses in recent years.
This house was a mishmash of the whole series, featuring monsters from each movie. That was great for variety because it wasn’t the same monster scaring you over and over in every room.
Insidious felt like a very grim haunted house, starting with the towering red door that began your dark journey into The Further. The experience was brimming with petrifying jump-scares accompanied by spine-tingling violin shrieks. The halls packed with mannequins put me on edge. I actually jumped at a lifeless mannequin; this house will do that to you.
Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013) thoroughly terrified me, so I was not ready for The Bride in Black reaching out to grab me. That double scare with the two Brides jumping out in sync from the left and right gave me heart complications. They didn’t let up for one second, and I applaud every scareactor for some incredible effort.
The house also had some off-putting moments from The Man Who Can't Breathe that made my skin crawl.
The Further led into a flush red lair that had no shortage of Darth Maul The Red Lipstick Demon. You were essentially assaulted from every direction (and essentially assaulted by Tiny Tim’s Tiptoe Through the Tulips). Yeah, it was scary, simply put.
1. The Museum: Deadly Exhibits
Unpopular opinion alert: My favorite house this year was The Museum: Deadly Exhibits. Was The Museum the undisputed best house at HHN 33? Absolutely not. But was it my favorite? Absolutely!
The Museum was rich with original folklore that kept it interesting throughout. It took place in The Museum of International Folklore, which was introducing its latest exhibit: The Rotting Stone. That artifact had been blamed for disease and famine, and as you could guess, it took over the whole museum and possessed the other exhibits.
The Museum intensified as you went deeper into the house; The Rotting Stone affected the exhibits more and more the farther you went. The beautifully glowing stone spread its rot throughout the building.
This house had some good jumpscares and atmospheric moments. I especially liked the Shades of the Mire, with masks coming to life; the Face in the Fog, with a harrowing ambiance; and the Halls of Mourning, with bizarre scareactors blending into the wallpaper.
The house reached its climax, of course, in The Rotting Stone exhibit. Personified Rotting Stone scareactors swarmed in the final scene, reminding me a bit of the Bloaters from last year’s The Last of Us.
The Museum: Deadly Exhibits had range from start to finish with good scares, interesting concepts, and on-point vibes that made it my favorite house of HHN 33.
What Were Your Favorites?
There you have it! What did you think of the haunted houses from this year’s Halloween Horror Nights? What were your favorites? Feel free to leave me a comment on social media!
Thanks for reading, and enjoy the rest of spooky season!
